HOMESCHOOLING PARENTS

I remember as a homeschooled sophomore in high school standing in the crowded audience surrounded by hundreds of kids my age as we all screamed “sex is great” at the top of our lungs. It doesn’t sound like an environment you would expect to find a homeschooler in, but my parents were actually excited about this opportunity. I was at a Silver Ring Thing (SRT) event.

SRT is a Christian abstinence program that hosts 3-hour events that seek to reach teens with the message that sex is great in the context of marriage. At the end of the show teens are given the choice to show their commitment to sexual purity by wearing a silver ring as a symbol of their decision to remain abstinent until marriage.

Teens today are submersed into a sexual culture and bombarded with messages from advertisements, media, and peers that saving sex for marriage isn’t a respectable standard, it’s an odd exception. As a result of these pressures teens’ morals have shifted; 50 years ago only 12% of girls viewed premarital sex as morally acceptable, as compared to 73% of girls today holding that perspective. Although homeschoolers are protected from many of the sexual pressures their peers are subjected to in school, the fact remains that our culture is not teaching an abstinence message and in almost every environment besides the home kids are subjected to sexual messages. Silver Ring Thing reinforces family values and gives homeschoolers an opportunity to play a part in spreading that message to those who haven’t heard it before.

Kevin Caello (homeschooling dad and Administrative Director at SRT) says that "those who sexually abstain in our culture now are considered a minority and “Silver Ring Thing is another way of reaching the culture with God’s truth and God’s ways.” Even though I personally grew up in a family where abstinence was thoroughly taught, I am very glad I attended a Silver Ring Thing event because it gave me a helpful layer of support and confirmation to my beliefs. People asking me about my silver ring has also given me several opportunities to help spread God’s truth through sharing my beliefs and convictions.

The Show

Silver Ring Thing takes their show on the road. The 3 hour event is packed with videos, comedy sketches, and serious talks to address why teens should stay sexually pure. The show is comprised of four main talks. “Sex is Great” is the first talk and breaks the ice by communicating that sex is a wonderful gift when used as God intended in the context of marriage. The second talk is “Dating & Waiting.” This talk doesn’t endorse dating or present it as a necessity, but is geared toward those who are waiting to date and are currently in relationships. The speaker emphasizes the importance of exercising personal maturity in who and when to date and personal testimonies are given from those who have been in dating relationships as to how to set physical boundaries to avoid compromising situations. In the third talk “Starting Over” a personal testimony is shared by someone who didn’t wait for marriage to have sex. The speaker explains the process of forgiveness he/she went through and how they were able to re-commit to purity. Practical steps for living a pure lifestyle are given for those in the audience who might be apprehensive to commit to purity because of mistakes in their past. The fourth talk is the “Gospel” presentation and is geared toward an un-churched audience. God’s power is elaborated on not only as it pertains to salvation, but also to strengthen teens to live pure lives. Teens are invited to accept Him as their personal Lord and Savior. SRT is excited that many of the teens who attend events become Christians.

Silver Ring Thing recognizes how crucial parents’ support is to help their children make wise decisions; education of parents is a vital element of the Silver Ring Thing’s mission. During Silver Ring Thing events at churches, homeschooling dad Kevin Caiello hosts a Parents’ Seminar in which he describes the sexual trends and activities teens are engaging in. The Parents’ Seminar seeks to educate parents so they can better relate to their children and open the lines of communication about sex.

How Graphic is the Content?

Some homeschooling parents have expressed concern as to whether the program is appropriate for their children. Kevin Caiello says that while the show is not for everyone, it is intentionally not graphic and is “designed in such a way that what is said does not pollute those who have limited knowledge of what we’re talking about, and those who do will know what we mean.” Kevin says they do use the term “oral sex” because kids are doing this at alarmingly high levels and many don’t understand that it is indeed sex and puts them at risk for most STDs.

How You Can Become Involved

The need for Silver Ring Thing is great and presents opportunities for homeschoolers to be involved on many different levels. The first way to be involved is simply coming to an event and recruiting others to come. An exciting opportunity homeschoolers might be interested in is joining “CREW” which is comprised of students who have been to a show and have further committed to help with Silver Ring Thing events. The CREW helps with lighting, show set-up and tear-down, various areas of production, and acts in on-stage skits as well as attending other fun activities and training sessions devoted to deepening a personal commitment to purity. Silver Ring Thing also welcomes volunteers of any age to help with show preparation and fundraising events.

Dr. Steve Suits is the chairman of the board of SCAIHS and has two sons who have been on CREW and dedicated themselves to Silver Ring’s efforts. Dr. Suits says that as a homeschooling father he believes that his kids participating in Silver Ring Thing have helped them put the values they have learned into action. “Silver Ring Thing has not only reinforced what we have taught our children,” Suits says, “but it has given them an opportunity to publicly testify to them and to encourage others in the same values.”

Lizzy Tyler was homeschooled from kindergarten until she graduated from high school; Lizzy is now a sophomore at Asbury College where she is studying Media Communications and Journalism.